If you're considering jumping into blogging, totally do it, unless you're going to write something offensive or funnier than me.
Here's helpful tips, warnings, and general nuggets of knowledge about the blogosphere to get you started!
1. Wow, avoid the comments section like the plague. Unless nobody is commenting. Then say something controversial so people will say hurtful things. That's how "fame" works.
2. People really up in here saying "everybody knows the only true path is Jesus" and thinking we're all going to nod along because they said it confidently.
3. There's so much ghostwriting! It's everywhere! And you'll never know what's ghostwritten and what isn't! It could be your favorite blogger. Your favorite novelist. It's definitely your favorite youtuber. I don't have ghostwriters. I promise I write all my stuff. Until I make enough money to pay somebody for it, it's all me.
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| This pic isn't funny. I just think Kendrick should be celebrated. |
4. Formatting is a bitch.
5. Having your own domain name is a RUSH OF PURE ADRENALINE.
6. Words are cheap. At least, that's what the people who hire ghostwriters think.
7. Views make you hard even if you only have, like, six.
8. Write a huge bunch of articles in a creative rush all at once and then schedule them to post over the next year. Sure, you won't stay relevant to any trends, but you also won't be scraping the bottom of your creative barrel, pushing a "fun" listicle into existence when you're exhausted every Wednesday.
9. People don't want to read an article about summoning Satan. Which was a TOTAL surprise to me.
10. If you studied 19th century literature, your writing will forever fail the internet requirement of simple, short sentences. You must, therefore, get awesome memes to attract readers.
BONUS THING YOU SHOULD KNOW
Making memes is much more labor intensive than writing the actual content of the blog. Luckily, you can easily STEAL THEM. STEAL THEM ALL BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Tag urself, I'm #studied19thcenturyliterature.
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